Seth sent me an email that said "Pirates of the Carribean: at world's end" will be 30 minutes longer than "Dead Man's Chest".
Well, it may be longer in time, but nothing will feel longer than Dead Man's Chest. So, in honor of this most glorious news, here is my review of P2. Enjoy.
*This email may contain adult language, reader's
discretion advised*
Please bare with me as what I'm about to write is just
my opinion. I still love everyone even if they don't
share the same overall sentiment.
That being said . . .
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest was by far
the stupidest movie I've seen this year. REALLY
Stupid. Where do I even begin? Well for starters it
was like 10 hours too long in desperate need of an
editor (I think at one point Kevin Costner leaned over
to me and said it was too long). It had a ridiculous
amount of anticlimactic fight scenes, back to back to
back to back, so choreographed that the dancers from
Chicago could have done it. Also, the story was
weaker than a watered down diet caffeine free Pepsi.
And those are the good things about it. . .
There is no reason that movie needed to be split in
two. Everything, I mean everything they set up in the
beginning could have been resolved. I know it seems
crazy, but instead of having, oh I don't know, 100
minutes of your film tied up in fighting, maybe you
could move forward in . . .what's the word. . .oh yeah
STORY. But oh no. No NO NO! Instead, they injected
fighting. And the fighting made the film drag. In
fact, the film dragged so much that at one point Jenny
said to me, "You know the movie's bad when I don't
care if anyone lives or dies."
To be fair, there were a few funny moments in the
beginning that gave the film some real promise. That
didn't last long however.
So, what do I really think? I think you should
totally go see it. It made me furiously angry, but,
who knows, you may think it's great.
After all, what people like in their movie experience
is totally subjective
. . .unless, of course, the movie's shit.
Phil
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1 comment:
Hey Phil,
It's about time you updated this blog!! So funny, we just happened to watch this movie on Saturday. About the time they were outfitting the Pearl with the sacrificial new crew I sighed, "Gosh this movie is so long!!!" I laughed out loud about Kevin Costner! The Postman has gone down in the annals of our movie watching history as the dullest, the longest, "Is this the unedited Costner Cut?" film of all time. I've just posted some cute photos from Easter, check my blog.
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