What would you think if you saw your Senior pastor having a beer in a restaurant. I don't have a problem with it. In fact, I would probably have more respect for him if he did have a beer. (As W. C. Fields once said "I never trust a man who doesn't drink.") So, why don't they drink responsibily in public?
Many people, when I ask this question tell me that Pastors could NEVER drink in public because they hold a higher standard. Okay, fine, I can see that. However, who in church leadership is being the example of a moderate drinker? What, nobody in church drinks? Is the congregation left to decide how much is too much? Is drinking against the church rules? The bible doesn't say never drink ever, never, ever. So, Pastor so-n-so sending the right message? Never drink, just like I never drink?
What do you think?
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5 comments:
Hey Phil,
Frank and I have been wrestling with this for a time now. Frank has never touched the stuff - I have. Nolan's dad was an alcoholic and my decision has been to never drink again - just in case there is anything to the heredity aspect.
Last summer a dear friend of ours - just a kid of 21 killed himself and another woman in a car wreck. He attended a college and career church group that has been tolerating drinking in moderation from the leadership and the group. On his 21st birthday the group took him out and got him drunk. He was drunk when he died. I realize there is such a thing as personal responsibility, but try telling that to most 21 year olds. No one in leadership apologized or took any responsibility for their part in this tragedy. And I do think they had a part.
Last week, Frank and I hosted a family member that has been trying to overcome his addiciton to alcohol. The afternoon he came, he had such bad D.T.'s that he came down and begged us to pray for him. He called prior to his visit and asked if I wouldn't lock up all of my baking extracts. (so he wouldn't get up in the night and drink them.) He doesn't go to church because the music and the strobe lights and even sometimes the fog machines that play during worship reminds him so much of the clubs he just left that he gets the shakes.
So, the question I find myself increasingly asking myself is.... can drinking be done in moderation? (Can you smoke in moderation?) And if so, what is my responsibility as a Christian woman for my fellow Christian's walk. Have we really moved away from even caring about being stumbling blocks. In fact, I think most of the church has bought hook line and sinker that if it's okay for me then just mind your own damned business.
It's glamorous to drink. You look like you have money if you know a lot about wine and which one to drink when and where.
Sunday, our sunday school teacher said that the verse we were studying was a good "toasting verse". What the heck does that even mean?
I had to make my house safe for our cousin. I locked up meds, turned on lights, prayed up, locked away cooking things that might tempt. He left safe and rested, thankful that he still had friends, family and place to go that he could count on.
It's like securing the house for the precious little babies in our lives. I would die if something happened to Ryan or Benjamin at my house because I hadn't made it a safe place for them to be. In fact, it would be irresponsible and wrong of me not to make it safe.
Shouldn't the church be a big safe house? Shouldn't it be safer than some 12 step program, meeting at the Y, that gives you some vague notion that you can't do it on your own and you need a higher power?
So, we've decided to take the really radical, ultra conservative fundamentalist view and be dry.
Frank and I actually get more respect and honoring of our views from our non believing frinds than from other Christians.
Sorry, to go on and on. I probably should have just posted this on my own blog, but I want to respect some anonymity.
I love you Heather! This is the type of discussion I want. I know this issue isn't black or white. Where do you draw the line, right? I don't think it's okay for a church group to declare they are going out to get hammered. On the other hand, going out for a drink and get a wonderful discussion about Elijah sounds pretty sweet.
I respect yours and Frank's decision to be dry. It doesn't make me love you less. You hit the nail on the head though. Personal responsibility and social responsibility are tough lines to draw and when we do, we desire to be accepted for that. IMHO
I have been thinking about what I wrote yesterday. I understand that many people drink in moderation and responsibly. It is possible, to answer my own question. But the question remains, what shall our stance as Christians be? Thanks for the love.
Sadly, some Christians do the total cop out and say, "Well Jesus Drank." that's total BS. Most people back then drank wine because the water was unfit to drink. My dad, who is a pastor, goes with the whole practice what you preach thing. When dealing with people who have alcohol problems, it's best to be dry so they feel they are understood that alcohol is bad. But I also know that the new pastor of NFC has beers (plural) with my brother-in-law all the time. How does he justify it? Don't know.
We also get this question tossed around because I'm a teacher. the whole "What if one of your students sees you drinking in public." My response to that is usually (not to sound too much like an ass) "Most of them see worse at home. Why not show them someone who drinks in moderation." But as a leader of a church, i think it's always safe to stay on the dry side of the line. But I totally get where you come from. the fact of the matter is that most people in church don't drink because people are blabber mouths and will talk crap about "I saw them drinking... bla bla bla."
Ben
I think making a decision on this comes down to more than ones faith because the Bible doesn't tell us drinking is sin...at least not in and of itself. The Bible does preach self control and drinking can quickly take control from you if you let it. Its a fine line. Is it bad to have a drink? No. Should we be looked down for having one? No. Will we? Likely yes, by some.
I have lost friends due to drinking ...some due to death, other due to it just consuming them. I have made the decision that I personally will allow myself to drink but I will NEVER let it control me. I will never let myself drink enough to get drunk. Its not hard for me though because I would prefer a Cherry Coke to any alcoholic drink. I've actually been made fun of at work functions for it but it also opened up a door to have some interesting convos with people about who I am and what I live for. I wouldn't have had those convos if I were getting drunk like the others. I also think while many people think they are a much cooler person when they are drunk...in actually it makes them look like idiots! They become loud and obnoxious to those who aren't loaded with them!
Anyway, those are my thoughts for now!
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